Makeup

Makeup is every girl's necessity. Apparently, they can't live without it. Yup, it makes girls look pretty, and all that, but it can do more! It can make an actor look sad, happy, mad, bewildered, abnormal, scary, and stuff! Then it can make emo dudes look emo, Zeus look Zeus-y, toes look like a family of toes, a mistake on a piece of paper turned into nothing on a piece of paper so you can try it again, and a monster look like a monster!

Let's say you're being creative, and you want to know what to do with your toes. If you're tall, you're also probably wondering "Why do my feet look so small?" With the right kind of makeup, you can make your toes look bigger! You can also put faces, hair, zits, beards, teeth, a nose, and eyes on the toes!

Today, you're walking down the beach, and you see some guy that's asleep. You don't know who he is, but no one is around him. You quickly grab your makeup, give the dude a mustache, and voila! Then you realize that the man is the Governor of some state. He doesn't know who did it though, so you're off the hook. Now you have space to put a fish on the hook!

You go to the grocery store, to buy groceries! You are walking past the strawberries... and suddenly a box happens to be inside your cart. You buy them since the check-out lady has already scanned the bar-code before you realized they were there. You can't possibly eat all those strawberries (actually, you could, but you don't want to feel guilty. Although, you don't need to feel guilty, it's fruit! But nevertheless...) you eat most of the strawberries, then need to figure out what to do with the rest. Boom! An idea hits you, right on the head! You can blend the strawberries into makeup and paint, then decorate the strawberries, or make other things look like strawberries!

If you're too lazy to use your brain to find something creative to decorate, then listen to me carefully. Very carefully. Very, very carefully... Just go buy an old, cheap TV, and wait for a show you hate to come on. Then look for your least favorite character. Hook up the TV to your DVR or whatever, pause the show, and paint that "disposable" TV with your makeup! Easy as pie, but pie isn't very easy to make. Unless you buy one, then it's pretty easy. But that's probably why they say easy as pie. They don't necessarily say "easy as making pie," so it could mean "easy as buying a pie!" Even then, it's still hard, because you have to make the money, drive all the way to the store, find a pie, then actually buy it. The hardest part it letting the cashier check everything out for you! Then to top it off, you need to drive all the way back home! So pie is hard to eat. It's like, rare!

If you're a guy that doesn't have any makeup in your possession at all, don't worry! You can use Photoshop! You just take a picture, draw on it in the app, then whazam! You have used makeup! It doesn't even have to be a good job if you're drawing randum things on anyone or anything!