Plastic

Plastic makes the world a better place. From plastic bottles, to plastic toys, to plastic tools, to plastic awesomeness, to plastic cafeteria food, there's plastic everywhere!

If we didn't have plastic, we would be living in a much more expensive world, where everything is expensive! Thanks to plastic, we don't have to cover everything in gold. King Tut lived in a world where plastic wasn't invented yet. That's sad for King Tut, because everything in he world was made of gold instead of plastic!

Down in Plasticland, people live in a world they've never lived in before. Some people escape from the world of old people, and they find themselves in Plasticland, where everything is orange and made of plastic. The purple section of Plasticland, of course, is still orange. Orange is the way of plastic, and awesomeness, yet it's no where near as awesome as blue in it's awesomeness.

Plastic didn't always exist. In fact, it wasn't ever supposed to happen. Some clumsy kid was just tired of dropping glass bottles on his feet and slicing off his toes, that he couldn't afford to lose his last toe, the second one from the left of his right foot. He got into his great-uncles blacksmith shop, and welded together a frog and his old toe. Then, when the fire attempted to punish him for creating plastic, he found a loophole! He froze the fire, and the fire wasn't expecting that. Now, if you find the right blacksmith shop, you can see the ancient frozen fire which looks like hair and attempted to stop the invention of plastic.

All those scientists say that Antarctica is just a big continent made out of ice, but I disagree. Antarctica is just a big continent made out of plastic. That's why penguins are attracted to the place, and they chose to fly their plastic helicopter toys to that area.

Plastic seems to overcome mice, just like on plastic mouse traps. Most mouse traps aren't made out of plastic, but the few that are have captured every mouse and sent it directly to the North Pole. There, they get so swollen that they look like elves, and Santa uses them to make presents to give away to every child in the world!

Plastic can even make bumper stickers to go on your cars which are partially made of plastic! They could say "I love MOM," "Darkness Dominates," or "I wear my Darth Vader mask in the shower!" So plastic has the option of getting lots of messages across the bridge to other people on their own island where they are taking a vacation. Did I mention that some were having a barbecue?

So plastic makes up this world, everything from lame to awesome, and awesome to AAAAAH, NO WAY, NO WAY!!! Then it can plummet back toward the Earth at an unearthly speed to get buried in someone's recycle bin. Then it gets taken to the recycling area to go through the recycling routine. Then your plastic computer mouse gets turned into a pointless fast food kid's meal toy. Still, plastic can do stuff.

Randum Thought: Lord Voldemort, we can't say his name and he can't brush his teeth.